Paranoia!?
Mood:  smelly
Topic: Deep Impact
So, I like putting forward loosely based, paranoid theories from time to time. One recent one was wondering if the sudden weather change (And continual weather flip-flopping here in Chicago) has been a direct result of the earth axis being nudge off a bit by the mega-quake which also brought on that ginormous tsunami last month. experts have stated that the weather has not been affected yet I feel like the weather has been REAL strange since then. I mean thunderstorm warnings and flash flood watches in January in Chicago?! Rain up the ass in California and many other warmer regions around the world...Could Dennis Quaid have been right in "The Day After Tomorrow?" Oh yeah, that's fiction...But could it be true?! (dramatic music)

The other paranoid ramble I have for you today is regarding the Nasa launch of "Deep Impact." A fine film (well an OK film) but better porn and now a probe that is intended to run into a comet and see what's inside. Nasa is very excited about this! Science conquers a new frontier.

However, remember a few years ago when there was a quick blurb going around about a comet potentially smashing into earth on or around 2028? What if...That was still true? I mean, far be it for the Bush administration to lie ro exagerrate anything but hmmm... One could also look at all that exciting Mars talk last year about how Nasa (not exactly the bastion of success after the Colombia disaster) was going to go ahead and get all sorts of money so that we can go to Mars...What if?

WHAT IF THE END OF DAYS IS REALLY HERE!?!?!

mwoo-ha-ha-ha-ha-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAAAA!!!!

Welp, true or not there's little I can do but make a lame blog post about it. Anyone want to sign up for an end of world orgy? Even if the world doesn't end and I am totally wrong (a distinct possiblity) at least we could have a massive fuck fest?!

Stupid wishful thinking.

UPDATE 1/13/05:
Stupid Red Nova.com ruins my paranoid delusions and thus furhter scrapping my group sex proposal!
CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. (AP) -- A NASA spacecraft with a Hollywood name - Deep Impact - blasted off Wednesday on a mission to smash a hole in a comet and give scientists a glimpse of the frozen primordial ingredients of the solar system.

With a launch window only one second long, Deep Impact rocketed away at the designated moment on a six-month, 268-million-mile journey to Comet Tempel 1. It will be a one-way trip that NASA hopes will reach a cataclysmic end on the Fourth of July.

I had originally thought the comet was un-named and that added to my lame-o conspiracy theory, Turns out it is called Comet Temple 1. They claim they didn't even deliberately steal the probe's name form the movie "Deep Impact."

"The scientists came up with the Deep Impact name independently of the movie studio, around the same time, neither knowing the other was choosing it, even though some members of NASA's Deep Impact team were consultants on the picture."

This is what the is supposed to happen:
"Scientists are counting on Deep Impact to carve out a crater in Comet Tempel 1 that could swallow the Roman Coliseum. It will be humans' first look into the heart of a comet, a celestial snowball still containing the original building blocks of the sun and the planets.

Because of the relative speed of the two objects at the moment of impact - 23,000 mph - no explosives are needed for the job. The force of the smashup will be equivalent to 4 1/2 tons of TNT, creating a flash that just might be visible in the dark sky by the naked eye in one spectacular Fourth of July fireworks display."

Yup, some 80 million miles away this July 4th! And it will only cost $330 MILLION DOLLARS to build this fancy shit and crash it into a comet! Fantastic! Also of note for you who give a shit about space stuff...Tonight the planet Saturn will be the closest to earth as it ever has been. Not to mention that this is happening too:

"The Huygens probe will plunge through the orange clouds of Saturn's moon Titan Friday, offering scientists their first glimpse of the mysterious moon."

Scientists expect to find a race of minature, yellow monkey looking fish that speak in Whale-tounge and will surely prompt an earth invasion unlike any we have experienced before!